...There's a wall that I tried to take down
What I should have said just wouldn't pass my lips
So I held back and now we've come to this
...And no one else to blame
All I can hear in the silence that remains
Are the words I couldn't say
- Words I Couldn't Say, Leighton Meester
I just can't imagine, how did you tumbled down those walls I had built? You are even far from anything I imagined. Far from anything I have been dreaming of. Far from everything I have been looking for. I guess it just all because of me, for I had let you be easy on me. I wonder, I wonder what the world has given to me. This feeling of the unknown, my stolen definition of like and love, really it makes me crazy.
Everything seems to have passed now BUT the thoughts of you still lingers on me. I know we are dangerous but can you blame me? It is hard to fight everything when the feeling still loves to stay.
In front of you, I act all calm, happy, mature, understanding and cool yet behind those is a feeling trying to scream without a sound. It is longing to be expressed, like or love, never it would matter to me now.
You said "You really really like me" and I said "I like you too". That's all, the end. Those words, they are not enough. Without actions they are never really enough.
There's a saying "Whatever has to be done, it's always your choice".
You had a choice, Nonetheless, I guess you're feelings for me we're not enough. Not enough for you to fight for that feeling you have for me. Not enough for you to take great risks just to be with me. It is not there, so I am not a choice but an option.
I also have a choice and I chose to be accept things, forgive and move on. Simple words but harder than one can ever imagine. Better choose the best and start to cut those weeds. I just can't linger longer than I should be, not anymore.
Now I trying to get healed, but there you are tempting and flirting around. I told myself why, what are you up to, how do you see me now that makes you create those careless games that you play. Yes I am vulnerable, so I plead you to stop. Stop! if don't share the same feelings at all.
